Founding father of social networks: Abraham LinkedIn
I’d be so pumped if Charlie Sheen is pulling a Bruce Wayne on us all! It’s all a cover, you guys!
Title of my humor book marketed toward campers: “Inside Jokes for Outside Folks”
I want to invent a diet where you’re allowed to eat beef, but you’re not allowed to look at a cow ever again.
Sometimes when I run a red light at the same time as another car, I yell to them “WE’RE GONNA LIVE FOREVER!!!”
I know there’s an FBI’s “Most Wanted” list, but is there an FBI’s “Loosest Cannon” list?
tumblrbot asked: WHAT IS YOUR EARLIEST HUMAN MEMORY?